Hot cocoa...

So sitting here and my boss tells me that she went, with her sister, to Ghirardelli in Downtown Chicago the other to get some hot cocoa... and it just came to mind, I need to do that with my two loves.

I love hot chocolate... and to have a Ghirardelli's here in the city, well, you need to and get some when the weather starts to turn colder. And since we've never done that, that's something that I know that my two loves would love to do.

I would love to be able to plan out a night out on the town for the three of us... carriage ride through the city, with the blankets on top of us. Then going to a dinner and then getting some yummy hot cocoa to end our night.

There are so many things that I would love to do with my little family... but since we are low on funds (LOL!), I decided to show them how much I care by cooking some very healthy foods and going to the gym together.

So on Tuesday, I cooked garlic broiled chicken with carrots and parsnips and brussel sprouts. Yum yum!! It was so good.

The little princess had two pieces of chicken!

Garlic rubbed roasted chicken with carrots, parsnips and brussel sprouts

I am so happy that I am able to make great tasting, healthy meals for my family... just because we are changing our diet and trying to eat better doesn't mean that you have to skimp on taste! 

And then yesterday, I cooked again for them...

It was white rice with beans, pork chops and plantanos... or fried plantains. It was so yummy!!

Added the avocado for good fat!

Things are starting to turn around for us... the light at the end of the tunnel seems to be burning brighter.
I want to do so much for my family... I want to move ahead. I want to get ahead. I want to make things easier for them.
And I know that with time, we will get there.

Sometimes feel as though things are spiraling into the wrong direction, no matter how much I try to turn it into the right direction.

This morning was an eye opener for me... as I sat across the table from 4 different people as they asked me questions about my current position.
I hope that things are lined up the way that I see them in my mind... so that I can sleep better and feel better about my professional life.

Well, I was hoping to write more today... but feeling all sorts of things right now, so hopefully tomorrow I will be able to write more.

Thanks for reading! 

End of the week...

Here are the current stats...

Starting weight: 238 pounds (the heaviest I have ever been in my life! I wasn't even that heavy during my pregnancy)
Current weight: 226 pounds (started a new cleansing diet that the hubby out me on at the beginning of September and have already lost 12 pounds!)
Goal weight: 170-175 pounds (I will leave it at that for now, not sure how I will look at that weight but hopefully I won't need to be any slimmer than that)

So for the last couple of days, I have been feeling so differently... I've been dressing differently, doing my make-up again, and taking pictures of myself to show myself how far I have come in less than 2 months.
Even though I have been on this weight loss journey for so many years, it wasn't until this year and more importantly, last month, that I have finally since the change in my body.

And since I am taking pictures of myself to document my journey... here is one to show that I am actually making strides in my journey.

You can see the difference in my face in how much just 12 pounds have made... I don't look puffy, I don't look like I'm a chipmunk (as much) and I'm seeing a change in both my skin & my attitude in general. My smile is even different in each picture!
I am drinking no less than a gallon a day of water, and my skin is showing me that it's liking it.

Things in the last few days have changed for me... I'm thinking clearer now.
I am letting the universe and God lead me into the right direction with some things. 
I've been contemplating some things in my life and praying hard for the right paths to come my way, but I have decided to let go and let God take over. 
I did that one other time in my life, many a years ago, and I was blessed with the man that I call my husband and best friend.
So I know the power of the Lord in my life... I just needed to let it go again and let HIM take over for me. 

I've been stressing a lot... I have let it go.
I've been not sleeping well... I have let it go.
I've been thinking too much... I have let it go.

Now to continue onto the path that has been laid down for me and know that when the time is right, things will be lined up and put into the right perspective for me. I can't allow stress or negative thoughts come into my mind and heart.
I have too much going for myself (and for my family) to let things like negativity, whether from a person or a situation, weigh me down.

My family needs me...
My friends need me...
I need me...

I am doing this for myself... and especially to show my little girl that this is a healthy lifestyle to live. She loves going to the gym and I love that about her. She gives me the boost of energy that I need in order to get myself to the gym. 
And since the gym isn't that far from the house, we've walked there when it's been nice out, but lately the weather hasn't been all that great to walk but she still asks if we can walk there. LOL! This little one of mine is too much. 

I hope and pray that this healthy lifestyle that we are showing her is something that she will carry with her for the rest of her life. And something that she will pass along to her own family.

I saw something that I had posted a year ago... and it actually still pertains to me today:

"Hope is not the absence of pain. Hope believes in the possibility that joy and laughter can dance with sorrow. Hope is the promise that no matter how heavy the burden, we can still find happiness."

And that, my friends, is what I hold onto... HOPE.
HOPE that my weight loss journey continues into a lifestyle that is finally accomplished.
HOPE for my little girl... that all that she wishes to do and accomplish in her life is done.
HOPE for my husband... for all that he sets his mind to do, is done.
HOPE for my friends... that the burdens and trials that they are currently facing be less as the days come and go.
HOPE for my family and friends... that the sense the love that I have for them, each and every day.

I believe

On Friday I felt all sorts of weirdness in my stomach. I left work and tried to figure out what it was all about but I couldn't figure it out.

I got home, after picking up the princess, and just sat in the couch still trying to figure it out. But nothing came to mind on why I was feeling this way.

So, the hubby and I dropped off the princess with my mother-in-law and we headed out for a date night with the hubs.

After having dinner at a Thai restaurant, checking out Barnes and Noble, the two of us went to check out the scary movie called "Annabelle". YIKES!
Even though the movie scared me, it was a wonderful night with the hubby. Something we hadn't been able to do in a while.

The weird feeling in my stomach finally went away by the end of the night, thankfully.

The rest of the weekend was good.
It didn't go as planned for the placed I wanted us to go but the quality time we spent together was just what my soul needed.

I'm so blessed to have a wonderful family to be around. I couldn't have asked for a better family.

And to start off the week right, we went to the gym for some yoga and meditation. Exactly what my soul called for to end my day.

Cannot wait to for the rest of this week to see how it going to be.
Keeping positive and keeping my soul content.

Happy 1st Friday of October!

It's the first Friday of the month and I'm excited for what October has in store.

Yesterday I mentioned that I needed to get myself out of the "pit" of my life and I needed a career change.

So today, I came into work with an idea of getting out of this place even more than I have ever thought possible.

BUT...

I have this strange feeling in the pit of my stomach today... I don't know what to make of it. 
I am actually sitting in front of this computer trying to figure out what to even write today.

So, since I am at stuck with both what I want to write and how to deal with getting out of this "pit".

Maybe I will feel better tonight after the gym... and spending time with my two loves.

Career Change Needed

Have you ever come to the point in your life that you know for a FACT that you need a career change? That something inside of you is just trying to bust through and allow you to be happy with the change that you should make?

You know that you should be happy with your job but things aren't what they are in life.

I have tried so many things to get out of the "corporate world" and work for myself... have more time for family, more money in my pocket to fix up the house and get the things that we need, but whenever I think that things are going well is when I notice that they actually aren't.

I tried selling Avon products once again, at the end of last year, and that didn't work out. I ended up spending more money out of my own pocket than receiving in profits.

I've tried to make chocolate candies for special occasions and even though I was able to get to fantastic orders (one baby shower and one graduation) but since the beginning of the summer, I haven't gotten any other orders since.

I have looked into ways to save money so that I can go back to school, but it gets harder and harder as days go by.
And now with the holidays coming, it's going to be even harder to save up for school. But I am hoping that I will be able to do this soon because I really want to do it.

Sometimes in life, you put yourself into a pit. Not knowing why you do this to yourself. 
Or maybe you do know why you put yourself into the pit... realizing that either you are afraid to move ahead for yourself or you are just afraid of what the future holds for you.
Either way, you need to be at the top of that pit with a ladder, giving yourself that little bit of assistance to help you out of that pit.

I have decided that I need to get myself out of this pit.
In order for me to move forward with my dreams.
In order to me to feel better about myself.
In order to know that I am stronger than what I have ever imagined possible.

And yes, ladies and gentleman, I am strong and I will come out on top of this.

Fall is here!

Starting weight: 238 pounds (the heaviest I have ever been in my life! I wasn't even that heavy during my pregnancy)

Current weight: As of September 30th, 2014 - 228 pounds! YAHOOO!!!!

Goal weight: 170-175 pounds (I will leave it at that for now, not sure how I will look at that weight but hopefully I won't need to be any slimmer than that)

So I already hit that first milestone in my weight-loss journey... losing those pesky first 10 pounds and I am so excited.

That was the goal for the month of September and I am so glad that I accomplished it. September was a hard month for me, gym and health wise.

First it was my mom getting bronchitis and then I got it... then the princess got sick... then I got sick again... the hubby got sick (we got sick together).
But in the middle of all that, I was able to sneak in a few days at the gym... thank goodness!

The diet that the hubby has me on is certainly helping me along. I am so grateful that the hubby researched this diet to turn my hormones around and in the beginning has helped me lose these first 10 pounds.
I am hoping for more weight loss... and at the end of this journey, I am hoping for not only some MAJOR weight loss but the change in my hormones that both the hubby and I are praying and hoping for.

Things have been great for me since August... and I so excited what the next couple of months have in store for me and for my family.

I have so many dreams and want to chase them all... but there is always something there stopping me.
I have meditated on how to move past these road blocks.... but I guess I need to meditate on these roadblocks and figure out what exactly is holding me back.

I think that I will have to do some deep meditation on this... I want to be certain that I am not the one blocking my own destiny, what might of been.

I am so grateful to have been introduced to meditation especially at a time in my life that I have felt that I so out of sync with myself and my life.

I have realized as Latinas, and as especially Latina mom's, we don't allow ourselves to take time for ourselves. 
Do you take time out of your day to do something that you want to do, even though there are a ton of things that need to get done at home?
Do you want to go to the gym but feel guilty that being away from the family for that hour at the gym?
Do you want to hang out with some friends of yours (and it's been forever since you have!) but know that you haven't really spent "quality" time with your little one(s) and your husband/partner?

We need to allow ourselves SELF-LOVE... that's not being selfish. That's giving you the time to get away and unwind. To know that when you LOVE YOURSELF, you can love everyone else around you with all your might.

And meditation has allowed me to focus on that.
Yes I admit, that have been times that I haven't meditated on a problem/issue and that problem/issue has consumed me. That's when I have to sit back and realize that I don't need to meditate for 10 minutes, I need to meditate longer... because I need to look internally for the solution to my problem/issue.

There is nothing wrong with feeling like you need to take some time away. That's SELF LOVE.
There is nothing wrong with feeling like you need to talk to some friends and not have your family with you. That's SELF LOVE.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to go to the gym. That's SELF LOVE and knowing that you want to get healthier for your family.

Be MINDfull of the things that you want out of life... meditate on it.