04/16/2012

WOW!! What an amazing weekend!

Thursday the 14th … worked as usual and I had my training that evening. My trainer Elliot is really pushing my limits. He and I got to talking and I admitted to him about my balance problem and he noticed it too. So he mentioned that we are going to be working on my balancing issues because I can have more problems in the future if I don’t take care of it sooner than later.
So the majority of the work out on Thursday night was all about balance. I am finally enjoying going to the gym… especially since I am learning so much about the different machines that I can use and what I do while using them. Thanks to the hubby for pushing me into getting the personal trainer.

Friday the 13th … went out with some fiends for Karla’s birthday. We went to a Costa Rican restaurant by the house, that Joel and I had wanted to go to for a while now, with the girls and have to admit that the food was very tasty.
Then we went to Tumbao’s afterwards for a little dancing. I wasn’t feeling all that great so I just sat there while everyone was dancing. Joel texted me around midnight and I asked him to pick me up, I was just so out of it that I just wanted to go home and rest, which is exactly what I did when I got home.

Saturday the 14th … we were out and about getting the last few things that I needed for Mayalis’ birthday party on Sunday. And can I tell you that I had a nightmare experience at Wal-Mart!? On Mayalis’ birthday, the 11 th , I had been taking pictures of her so that I can get some “thank you” cards printed up with her picture on them.
So I finally got a great picture of her, uploaded it on the Wal-Mart website and sent it off to be printed. Well, the option of one-hour pick-up was there and I was hoping to be able to pick them up later that evening but that didn’t happen and that’s why we were there on Saturday to pick them up.
So we get to the photo department to find out that they couldn’t find my order!!! Are you kidding me?!??! So long story short, after being in that department for 2 hours, we finally got the cards printed up (after they had to reboot the printer) and I got a $10 gift card from them for my trouble.
So later that evening… Joel and I went to the movies with a friend of his from high school. We went to see “21 Jump Street” and can I tell you that the movie was funnier than I expected it to be?!? LOL!! It was a great laugh especially after the afternoon that I had at Wal-Mart.

Sunday the 15th … Party time!!! And boy did the party go off without a hitch! I am so many people made it out to the party and made it such a special day for my princess. And can I tell you that she had such a great time while we were at Pump It Up! I am hoping that I can take her there again soon. Running around, climbing, going down the slides… and she did the same thing that her mommy did! LOL!! I can honestly say that even the adults had a wonderful time there. And that made it all worthwhile at the end… making sure that everyone had a wonderful time while there. The food, the pizza and the cake… yummy!
Even though we had a little problem when we went to pick up the ice cream cake –can you believe that they misspelled her name (they spelled it Mayalih instead of Mayalis!!) and her name was a different color on the cake then the rest of it because of the misspelling, but everything turned out great in the end.
After the party, we dropped off everything at home and then headed to my cousins’ house (Juan and Lisa) for a BBQ.
OMG, we couldn’t have asked for a better day for my little girl. She enjoyed every minute of it! We got home after 9:30 and it was shower and bedtime for the both of the girls… I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer!

We didn’t get a chance to open up her presents last night when we got home… so hopefully that will be done tonight. I cannot wait to see her open up the presents.

She is a blessed little girl; she is surrounded by so many people that love her. I am so thankful that I have her in my life.

This is going to be a long week since I will be working all week… and our next day off of work isn’t until Memorial Day in May!! UGH!!!

It’s going to be a long April and May.

Okay… so I haven’t logged in what I have been eating the last couple of days.

So I am not going to start from last Thursday because that would make no sense, so I will start from today.

Breakfast: Honey Nut Cheerios with milk

Morning snack: Nothing! Ugh… been trying to work on a project and it’s not going anywhere.

Lunch: a piece of French bread and some baked mostaciolli and a banana.

Everywhere I look, I am drinking water… which I am very grateful to the fact that I love drinking water and so does Mayalis.

Afternoon snack: Wheat squares

And onto the house I go to help my princess open up the presents from her birthday party… and have a little dinner.

04/05/2012

Breakfast –ahhh, I finally mixed it up a little.

I had an egg and cheese wrap from Dunkin Donuts with some hash browns. It had been a while since I had any, so it was nice to indulge a little.
I
didn’t have a chance to get in my morning snack today. So kind of sad about my lack of time to be able to do it.

So for lunch I had a half turkey sandwich and tomato soup at Panera. Not a huge fan of Panera, but I went along for the ride with the ladies here at work. Let’s see what I have for my afternoon snack and for dinner.

Let’s see… my evening training session was great! I am feeling a little of the muscle work today. I really can’t lift my arms today, but that’s okay, no real reason to do so.

Next session will be on Tuesday, April 10 th at 6pm. So I will have to be ready to kick some butt that day, because my butt is going to be kicked big time! LOL! But I don’t mind all the pain that I am going through because at the end, I will be feeling and looking so much better. And Joel said that if he sees results with this guy, he will continue paying for me to train with him.

I am debating on whether or not I want to go to the gym. Maybe I’ll just do a little something at home until my body get used to the whole kicking my butt business.

Just really busy here at work with so many different projects going on.

I am so happy that today is my official last day of the work for the week. I am looking forward to the long holiday (Easter) weekend ahead of us.

I am happy that I will be able to hang out with everyone and relax.

I spoke to Joel earlier and he really wants to see that movie that came out, Hunger Games (based on the books of the same name). He asked me if we can go tonight to go see it… and I caved in and said yes.
So I am looking forward to a little us time tonight… it’s been a while. We are going to have a wonderful time tonight!

04/04/2012

Breakfast: Oatmeal, egg and a banana; my coffee; my 32 ounces of water and my multivitamin and flax seed oil pill.

Up next… my snack at 10:30 and then lunch at noon.

I am really thinking that I need to switch up my breakfast… I don’t want to get tired of the oatmeal nor do I want my body to get used to just one type of breakfast meal.

I am really hoping for the same energy that I had yesterday for today, especially since I woke up at 2:30 this morning and really didn’t get back to sleep until after 3:30am. Not good at all… this is going to be a bad day if I don’t get that little bit of energy to get me through the day.

Well I am happy to report that Mayalis is trying to feed herself and it started last night at my parent’s house. She was “upset” at me while I was serving her because she wanted me to serve her in her little Dora the Explorer bowl.

What we did was just add a little bit of food at a time into her bowl and she would put the food onto her spoon and then she would transfer the food into her mouth, all on her own! I am so proud of my little girl… she is so independent and smart!

Lunch was great! Had some shrimp fried rice and some chicken with broccoli.

I have nothing much to report this afternoon… just living day-to-day. Hoping and praying for good things to come our way.

We checked my credit score this weekend and I have to admit that it isn’t all that bad. I thought that it was going to be worse! So hopefully sometime this summer I will check it again and it will show me something good so that we can start looking for a house.

I really can’t wait to be able to say that we are officially homeowners. That is the dream… that I want to make a reality.

Next up is my afternoon snack … but the way that I am feeling right now, I don’t know if I will be able to have anything. I am super full right now, not to the point that I am going to fall over or anything, just full. And it didn’t help that I just drank of bunch of water right now.

A little disappointed right now… Joel and I might have to cancel the membership to XSport since they are giving us the run around about some charges that they made on both our accounts. They double charged our accounts for the personal training and now Joel had to call their corporate office to get it fixed. And he said that if they don’t fix it, that we will not only cancel the personal training, we will be cancelling the membership too.

So my training appointment for tonight is up in the air… until he hears back from the corporate office, I won’t know whether or not we will still have a membership there. I guess I better start thinking about what I will be doing for working out at home. I guess I will be using my Fitness Magazines a little more than just reading through them and seeing what I can do as far working out at home.

That will help us save some money, though. That’s a plus.

Well, I had my afternoon snack and it was very yummy and hit the spot.

I’ve already finished off my 2 nd cup of 32 ounces of water… and I might have another cup of water soon.

Feeling sort of dry inside right now and I don’t understand why… but I really got to run to the bathroom before my bladder explodes right here.

Yipee!!! The issue with XSport was fixed and I was able to go to my training session tonight. And my session was great.

My trainer pushed me a little more this session and he told me that the first two weeks of sessions he doesn’t go all crazy on me because he wants to see what I am capable of doing but after that, all that goes out the window. YIKES!!!
And if he took it easy on me tonight, then I am in for a serious butt kicking in a couple more session. But I am glad that he is going to do this for me. I am working muscles that I probably don’t really use and I am using machines in the gym that I probably wouldn’t use if it wasn’t for this.

Dinner wasn’t all that exciting.. I had a better dinner on Sunday night at my cousin’s house (made by him and his wonderful partner, Lisa) than I’ve had all week. LOL!!

I need another home cooked meal… maybe I’ll get a good one before the end of the week.

So now I am in bed looking forward to finally getting some rest. Not having to work on Friday is something that I am so looking forward to. Until tomorrow…

Only 7 days until our princess turns 2 years old!!! YIPPEEE!!!!

04/03/2012

Breakfast: Oatmeal, egg and a banana; my coffee; my 32 ounces of water and my multivitamin and flax seed oil pill.

Up next… my snack at 10:30 and then lunch at noon.

How am I feeling this morning? Great! Didn’t wake up grumpy as usual, LOL! I slept through the night, so feeling wonderful about that. It’s been a while since that’s happened so it’s an awesome feeling knowing that I slept through the night.

How am I feeling physically after my training last night? OMG! I feel totally empowered! I feel like I can finally attain that goal of mine of losing those 50 pounds that I have been carrying around forever.

I know that last night’s session wasn’t a full session but more of a “checking me out” session and see what I can do, but I have to say that I am proud of myself. Proud that I walked around the gym with a little better sense of what I can start doing for myself.

The workouts weren’t all that bad. I survived them and I am happy about that. That 6 pound medicine ball that I worked out with was no joke. Hopefully later down the line, I will be able to conquer that ball and my balance issues.

My trainer advised me that he needs to work on my core, my back, my arms and my legs. He did tell me that I have pretty strong shoulders. Weird, but I’ll take it because the word strong is something that I am usually told that I am. The other exercises weren’t that bad either. I can’t wait until I master those suckers too!

He had me running on the treadmill on an incline of 4.0 and I thought for sure that I was going to fall but I have to admit that I survived it, especially since it was going at 5.0 miles an hour! Okay, okay… I only ran it for a minute, but it felt like an eternity. LOL! Hopefully I won’t feel so out of breath the next time I do it. He also taught me how to properly stretch before starting my work out… and boy did I feel things that I have never felt before. He said that I should always stretch before working out because then my major muscles are ready to start burning fat while I am doing my workouts. Fine by me… as long as we are burning fat, I am totally up for that. I can’t wait until I am completely strong. I will be happy when I am strong enough hat I will be able to do more. I will be happier when my body mass index (BMI) is so much lower and I will be able to burn fat faster. I will be just so much happier when I don’t have all this fat inside of me.

Okay, okay… I know that my trainer isn’t a miracle worker and in a blink of an eye he will have me doing all this soon, but I know that with time, I will be able to attain those small steps to a better me.

Here is a question that I would like answered… how can one person feel so alone in a room full of people? It seems no matter what is said or done, things are always the same. You are in a room full of people but no one speaks to you, no one realizes that you are around or they just don’t care that you are. It happens more and more each day. And I try not to let it bother me but I’m human, how can I not let it bother me? When I see so much interaction going on around me and I am not part of any of it.

How people can ignore a message that is sent to them. I know that I sent it to them… but yet, no response from them. They say that you should extend yourself out to people in order to get the extension back but how many times should I continue extending myself out to people that don’t bother to acknowledge the act? If I continue to walk away from people, I won’t be left with anyone.

You can only allow people to ignore you for so long before you just give up and move on. It seems to affect some people when you move on but with others, I guess they could care less. And I guess I have more of those “careless” people in my life than I realized.

How hurtful can people be? How can they continue to hurt a “friend” and not even realize it?

How long can someone not talk to them before they realize that a friend is breaking away? I guess to some, it doesn’t matter. I guess some people hope that you walk out of their lives so that they can have control over other things.

I am now on my next mini-meal of the day, my snack. I was supposed to have it at 10:30am but the time got away from me and I am having it a half an hour later. Well, it’s better late than never. I am having an 80 calorie pineapple-coconut yogurt with 3 teaspoons of granola in it. Can’t wait to try the yogurt, I haven’t had it yet.

And I am pleasantly surprised on how good this yogurt tastes.

Lunch was so good… I had a one cup of scallop potatoes, Brussels sprouts, roasted chicken leg and one ½ corn on the cob. It was very filling but not to the point that I am super full. It was just the right amount of food. Lunch conversation was very funny. Now we are all looking forward to getting out of work and enjoying the afternoon weather. Hopefully it doesn’t rain like they said it was supposed to… I would really like to spend some time outside with Mayalis tonight.

I guess I should be writing some of this stuff in my training journal, huh? But it is just so easy to type everything out and just post it on my blog and print it out for my journal. Don’t get me wrong, I love to write… so I will just take some of my own work here and transfer it to my training journal. Especially since everything is just about written out here, I just have to look up to the screen and copy what I need for the journal word-for-word.

Next up is my afternoon snack… and I will have to figure out what it is that I am going to eat. Maybe a cheese stick, or maybe some crackers or who knows what I will have a taste for later. We shall soon see.

Well, I didn’t go the route that I thought that I was going to go. I decided to eat some honey wheat Wheat Thins Stix and some potted meat. Okay, okay… I know that the potted meat isn’t the “greatest” thing in the world but I could have done worse. LOL! I will make up for it tonight during dinner. And if the weather cooperates, I will be able to walk around with Mayalis tonight.

Well, it’s just 8 days until our little princess turns 2 years old… OMG… I am so excited! She is so smart and getting so long. And her hair!!! I am so happy that her hair is getting so long now. For the longest time, I thought that her hair wouldn’t grow out. And when I wash her hair, it is so long when it’s wet. I know that she will have curly/wavy hair, you can tell especially since her hair doesn't just lay flat like mine did when I was her age. My beautiful little girl! I will continue to work hard to make sure that my little girl continues to grow in every way possible. I want her to know that both her parents are going to be by her side every step of the way and know that she will always have our support.

Next up is dinner… since I kind of slacked off with my afternoon snack, I will have to see what I have for dinner tonight. Maybe a light dinner of whatever is around the house.

And it’s almost time to go home from work… and other than my very first journal entry back in September; this is the 2 nd longest entry that I have written. I am looking forward to going home and relaxing tonight, especially since I will be having another long night tomorrow night.

Dinner was good… rice with some roasted chicken, cucumbers and some watercress. It was yummy! I wasn’t able to get outside with Mayalis because she was asleep when I got home and by the time she woke up, it was late and the temperature was starting to drop.

I am already in bed because I am so exhausted after the day that I had at work and hopefully I will be able to get some rest… so that’s why I decided to finish off this entry before I got too tired to type. I have to write up my training journal tomorrow morning, need to make sure that it is done for tomorrow night.

Looking forward to another great day tomorrow.

04/02/2012

The second day of my blogging and the first night of my personal training! OMG! I am so nervous and excited at the same time! I am so looking forward to seeing what this trainer has in store for me. I am going to keep this trainer liable for anything that doesn’t happen! I will make sure that the gym is help liable for no results that come from this trainer… and I will NEVER use another trainer ever again if nothing comes out of this.

I know that the training is more tilted towards me and the effort that I put into it but we are paying for someone to get me results and damn it, I want results! So I am praying for myself – to give me the strength that I need to get the results that I need and want. And to also give me strength to get through any workouts that he might put me through.

My goal is becoming clearer and clearer each passing day… I am so excited for the results come the end of the year. I want to a totally different person. I said at the beginning of this year that this will be my year and by-golly I will make it my year. I am going to accomplish just about all that I have put out there to accomplish!

It is now 9 days until my princess’ birthday and 13 days until her birthday and 13 days until her birthday party… I am so excited for both!! She just keeps getting bigger and bigger right before my eyes. I am so amazed of her and everything that she is becoming.

Well, I must share that I got my period over the weekend… month 3 of getting it without any medication. Can someone overuse the word “excited” in one blog posting? LOL!! Okay… so I won’t say I am excited about getting it because how can you but I am thankful that I am getting it naturally again. I have defeated the doctors who said that I would not be getting my period ever again! And I will defeat them when I get pregnant!

I’m telling you, things are finally turning into the right lane for me and I am enjoying every minute of this ride.

This is the journey of a lifetime and those that are interested in coming along with me are more than welcome to join in. Every single day is a new challenge for me, and I face each one of these challenges head on. They test my strength, they test my faith and most importantly, they test me. I want to pass each challenge with flying colors.

I have been reading just about each night now… both for me and to Mayalis. I want her to have the same passion that I have for books. I want to find her one day in her room just lost in a book like I used to do. When everyone else is causing troubles, I was just reading about all sorts of places and people. I want her to have an imagination that will never cease. I want her to have all the opportunities that I
had plus more.

So I had my first personal training tonight and it was great. Thankfully I haven’t gained any weight since last week…. So a great way to start off a personal training session. My trainer took it a little slow with me –and he warned me that the next session he wouldn’t be so “nice” –so I was able to make it out of the gym on my own two feet. I felt GREAT!!! I can’t until my next session on Wednesday night at 6:30pm.

I am seeing the light…. The light is VERY far away but I do see a twinkle of light ahead of me. I am feeling a little more confident… and I can’t wait until I am feeling so confident that I don’t have to think twice about it.

Life is getting so much better for the three of us… and it will only get better.

04/12/2012

Okay… I slacked off… and I didn’t post for a few days. So here is the update for the last 7 days.

Thursday the 5th … We went to see Hunger Games that night and it was a GREAT movie!! OMG!! We enjoyed it so much! Even though for some reason I get “sea sick” when the camera is bounced up and down T-O-O much during a movie, I didn’t want that little bit of feeling sick during the movie ruin the movie for me. I just threw up AFTER the movie was done! LOL!!
I cannot wait until the 2nd movie comes out so that we can see it too. A great movie for everyone to see… definitely a crowd pleaser.

Friday the 6th was great… the three of us hung out all day!! We got so much done that day. I love it when hang out like that, a nice little family. And Mayalis enjoyed every second of being out with mommy and daddy. We had such a wonderful day together. It was so nice to go out as a family. We even paid off Mayalis’ birthday party at Pump It Up and we tried some of the food next door at Red Tomato. It was good pizza… everyone is going to enjoy it on Sunday the 15th .
Then we hung out at home, just the three of us. I was supposed to go out to dinner with my cousin’s girlfriend, but it didn’t happen. Hopefully she and I can get together soon so that we can have a nice little dinner out without the boys. LOL!!

Saturday the 7th … my mom and I took Mayalis’ to her twin cousin’s 1st birthday party in Park Ridge. It was a nice time had by all. She ran around like a crazy woman! LOL!
I was even able to get Mayalis a few pairs of shoes that she so desperately needed. That little girl is growing up so quickly that we can’t keep up with her in regards to clothes! LOL!
Then Joel met up with us and we had a late lunch at Chili’s… good time had by all.

Sunday the 8th … Easter! What a wonderful day/night. My mom and I went to my brother’s house to see the boys and to give Joshua his birthday present since his birthday is on the 9 th. Afterwards, we went back home.
We were supposed to go and see my mother-in-law, but the time was winding down on us and we didn’t make it since we had dinner plans at my aunt’s house. So we all got ready to leave and head over to Diana’s house for Easter dinner. And we had a wonderful time! The food was awesome… the laughs… Mayalis played around with Gabriel… it was great times!

Monday the 9th … Joshua’s birthday! My nephew/godson birthday… he turned 8 years old today. I didn’t make it into work today because I was sick all night. I guess I overdosed on the delicious food from the night before. So I got some stuff done around the house and even made it to the gym. Very extra proud of myself since I wasn’t feeling up to it but still made it to work out. Picked up Mayalis from my mother-in-law’s house and then headed home.

Tuesday the 10th … back to work I go. It was a very crazy day at work since I didn’t make it on Monday. I kept my nose to the grind and got a lot done. It was my friends Karla’s birthday (we have plans to go out on Friday night). I had my training at the gym that night… and it was great! My arms and chest areas were worked that night and boy did my arms feel like jell-o afterwards. But it was a great feeling. I love it!
Joel received 3 tickets to go to the Cubs game that night and invited me to go but of course since I had my personal training at the same time, I couldn’t back down on my training to go to a game (which he totally understood) so he went to the game with his brother and some friends from work. I was bummed that I couldn’t make it… so hopefully I can go to another game sometime this summer.

And the big day finally arrived…

Wednesday the 11th … Mayalis’ 2nd birthday!! YIPPEE!!!
Even though I did work that morning, I took a half-day at work and did a bunch of things after work before picking her up from my mother-in-law’s house. I wanted her to have a special day. When I got out, I picked up balloons… my mom had told me that she had picked up a little cake for her so that was covered. I got to my mom’s and decorated the dining room for Mayalis for when she got home, she would see all the balloons that we got for her. The dining room looked GREAT! So since I got that done pretty quickly, I decided to clean up the apartment a bit too. I had a lot of energy to burn! LOL!

So around 2:15 or so, I went to pick up the birthday girl. And boy was I surprised when I got to my mother-in-law’s house… the living room at her house was FULL of balloons too! It was great! Mayalis LOVES balloons… just like her momma! LOL!! My dream has always been to enter a room for my birthday that is just full of balloons! LOL!

And boy was her face lit up when she walked into the dining room of my parent’s house and saw all the balloons, especially the Dora the Explorer one that we got her. That one is the same size that she is! LOL!

When she saw the birthday cake that my mom had gotten her, she said “cake” and even started singing happy birthday too! That little girl just amazes me each and every day.

She received a phone call from my aunt in Puerto Rico and she walked around the backyard with my mom’s cell phone in her ear “talking” to my aunt. My aunt even sang her a song in Spanish and Mayalis loved it. That little girl is something else. I don’t know what to do with her sometimes… I just sit back and enjoy every single moment that I share with her. And I am proud of every achievement that she has accomplished in her short little life and look forward to the all the ones that she has ahead of her in life. She is making her parents very proud of her… and she’s only 2 years old.

She was one happy little girl yesterday! We had a pizza dinner in her honor… and we even had a balloon fight too! It was such a GREAT night… we all laughed and had a fun time with her. We went to bed a little late but it was worth it! As long as our princess had a wonderful time, that is all that matters to me.

And now today… I woke up late this morning but thankfully I got to work on time. Thanks to my mom for calling me this morning to wake me up. I can’t believe that instead of snoozing my alarm, I turned it completely off! What a dork! LOL!!

Tonight I have another session with my trainer and I am looking forward to him kicking my butt tonight… I surely needed it.

This is my year of accomplishments and I hope to make each and every one of them come true.

I have to order the cake for this weekend… so I will be headed to Jewel after my workout. I hope that it isn’t as expensive as I think that it might be.

I can’t believe that Mayalis’ birthday party is this Saturday the 15 th . If she enjoyed the party last Saturday and her birthday yesterday, she is going to be beyond happy on Sunday.
Well, it’s still early and I am sure that I will write more tonight after I get back from the gym.

April 4th - YIIPPEEE!!!

Breakfast: Oatmeal, egg and a banana; my coffee; my 32 ounces of water and my multivitamin and flax seed oil pill.

Up next… my snack at 10:30 and then lunch at noon.

I am really thinking that I need to switch up my breakfast… I don’t want to get tired of the oatmeal nor do I want my body to get used to just one type of breakfast meal.

I am really hoping for the same energy that I had yesterday for today, especially since I woke up at 2:30 this morning and really didn’t get back to sleep until after 3:30am. Not good at all… this is going to be a bad day if I don’t get that little bit of energy to get me through the day.

Well, I am happy to report that Mayalis is trying to feed herself and it started last night at my parent’s house. She was “upset” at me while I was serving her because she wanted me to serve her in her little Dora the Explorer bowl. What we did was just add a little bit of food at a time into her bowl and she would put the food onto her spoon and then she would transfer the food into her mouth, all on her own! I am so proud of my little girl… she is so independent and smart!

Lunch was great! Had some shrimp fried rice and some chicken with broccoli.

I have nothing much to report this afternoon… just living day-to-day. Hoping and praying for good things to come our way.

We checked my credit score this weekend, and I have to admit that it isn’t all that bad. I thought that it was going to be worse! So hopefully sometime this summer I will check it again and it will show me something good so that we can start looking for a house. I really can’t wait to be able to say that we are officially homeowners. That is the dream… that I want to make a reality.

Next up is my afternoon snack … but the way that I am feeling right now, I don’t know if I will be able to have anything. I am super full right now, not to the point that I am going to fall over or anything, just full. And it didn’t help that I just drank of bunch of water right now.


A little disappointed right now… Joel and I might have to cancel the membership to XSport since they are giving us the run around about some charges that they made on both our accounts. They double charged our accounts for the personal training and now Joel had to call their corporate office to get it fixed. And he said that if they don’t fix it, that we will not only cancel the personal training, we will be cancelling the membership too. So my training appointment for tonight is up in the air… until he hears back from the corporate office, I won’t know whether or not we will still have a membership there.

I guess I better start thinking about what I will be doing for working out at home. I guess I will be using my Fitness Magazines a little more than just reading through them and seeing what I can do as far working out at home. That will help us save some money, though. That’s a plus.
Well, I had my afternoon snack and it was a Weight Watchers ice cream bar. It was very yummy and hit the spot.

I’ve already finished off my 2nd cup of 32 ounces of water… and I might have another cup of water soon. Feeling sort of dry inside right now and I don’t understand why… but I really got to run to the bathroom before my bladder explodes right here.

Yipee!!! The issue with XSport was fixed and I was able to go to my training session tonight. And my session was great. My trainer pushed me a little more this session and he told me that the first two weeks of sessions he doesn’t go all crazy on me because he wants to see what I am capable of doing but after that, all that goes out the window. YIKES!!! And if he took it easy on me tonight, then I am in for a serious butt kicking in a couple more session. But I am glad that he is going to do this for me. I am working muscles that I probably don’t really use and I am using machines in the gym that I probably wouldn’t use if it wasn’t for this.
Dinner wasn’t all that exciting.. I had a better dinner on Sunday night at my cousin’s house (made by him and his wonderful partner, Lisa) than I’ve had all week. LOL!! I need another home cooked meal… maybe I’ll get a good one before the end of the week.
So now I am in bed looking forward to finally getting some rest. Not having to work on Friday is something that I am so looking forward to.

Until tomorrow… only 7 days until our princess turns 2 years old!!! YIPPEEE!!!!

April 3 - Another Day

Breakfast: Oatmeal, egg and a banana; my coffee; my 32 ounces of water and my multivitamin and flax seed oil pill.

Up next… my snack at 10:30 and then lunch at noon.

How am I feeling this morning? Great! Didn’t wake up grumpy as usual, LOL! I slept through the night, so feeling wonderful about that. It’s been a while since that’s happened so it’s an awesome feeling knowing that I slept through the night.

How am I feeling physically after my training last night? OMG! I feel totally empowered! I feel like I can finally attain that goal of mine of losing those 50 pounds that I have been carrying around forever. I know that last night’s session wasn’t a full session but more of a “checking me out” session and see what I can do, but I have to say that I am proud of myself. Proud that I walked around the gym with a little better sense of what I can start doing for myself.

The workouts weren’t all that bad. I survived them and I am happy about that.

That 6 pound medicine ball that I worked out with was no joke. Hopefully later down the line, I will be able to conquer that ball and my balance issues.

My trainer advised me that he needs to work on my core, my back, my arms and my legs. He did tell me that I have pretty strong shoulders. Weird, but I’ll take it because the word strong is something that I am usually told that I am. The other exercises weren’t that bad either. I can’t wait until I master those suckers too!

He had me running on the treadmill on an incline of 4.0 and I thought for sure that I was going to fall but I have to admit that I survived it, especially since it was going at 5.0 miles an hour! Okay, okay… I only ran it for a minute, but it felt like an eternity. LOL! Hopefully I won’t feel so out of breath the next time I do it.

He also taught me how to properly stretch before starting my work out… and boy did I feel things that I have never felt before. He said that I should always stretch before working out because then my major muscles are ready to start burning fat while I am doing my workouts. Fine by me… as long as we are burning fat, I am totally up for that.

I can’t wait until I am completely strong. I will be happy when I am strong enough that I will be able to do more. I will be happier when my body mass index (BMI) is so much lower and I will be able to burn fat faster. I will be just so much happier when I don’t have all this fat inside of me.

Okay, okay… I know that my trainer isn’t a miracle worker and in a blink of an eye he will have me doing all this soon, but I know that with time, I will be able to attain those small steps to a better me.


Here is a question that I would like answered… how can one person feel so alone in a room full of people? It seems no matter what is said or done, things are always the same. You are in a room full of people but no one speaks to you, no one realizes that you are around or they just don’t care that you are. It happens more and more each day. And I try not to let it bother me but I’m human, how can I not let it bother me? When I see so much interaction going on around me and I am not part of any of it. How people can ignore a message that is sent to them. I know that I sent it to them… but yet, no response from them. They say that you should extend yourself out to people in order to get the extension back but how many times should I continue extending myself out to people that don’t bother to acknowledge the act? If I continue to walk away from people, I won’t be left with anyone. You can only allow people to ignore you for so long before you just give up and move on.

It seems to affect some people when you move on but with others, I guess they could care less. And I guess I have more of those “careless” people in my life than I realized. How hurtful can people be? How can they continue to hurt a “friend” and not even realize it? How long can someone not talk to them before they realize that a friend is breaking away? I guess to some, it doesn’t matter. I guess some people hope that you walk out of their lives so that they can have control over other things.


I am now on my next mini-meal of the day, my snack. I was supposed to have it at 10:30am but the time got away from me and I am having it a half an hour later. Well, it’s better late than never. I am having an 80 calorie pineapple-coconut yogurt with 3 teaspoons of granola in it. Can’t wait to try the yogurt, I haven’t had it yet. And I am pleasantly surprised on how good this yogurt tastes.

Lunch was so good… I had a one cup of scallop potatoes, Brussels sprouts, roasted chicken leg and one ½ corn on the cob. It was very filling but not to the point that I am super full. It was just the right amount of food. Lunch conversation was very funny. Now we are all looking forward to getting out of work and enjoying the afternoon weather. Hopefully it doesn’t rain like they said it was supposed to… I would really like to spend some time outside with Mayalis tonight.
I guess I should be writing some of this stuff in my training journal, huh? But it is just so easy to type everything out and just post it on my blog and print it out for my journal. Don’t get me wrong, I love to write… so I will just take some of my own work here and transfer it to my training journal. Especially since everything is just about written out here, I just have to look up to the screen and copy what I need for the journal word-for-word. 
Next up is my afternoon snack… and I will have to figure out what it is that I am going to eat. Maybe a cheese stick, or maybe some crackers or who knows what I will have a taste for later. We shall soon see.
Well, I didn’t go the route that I thought that I was going to go. I decided to eat some honey wheat Wheat Thins Stix and some potted meat. Okay, okay… I know that the potted meat isn’t the”greatest” thing in the world, but I could have done worse. LOL! I will make up for it tonight during dinner. And if the weather cooperates, I will be able to walk around with Mayalis tonight.

Well, it’s just 8 days until our little princess turns 2 years old… OMG… I am so excited! She is so smart and getting so long. And her hair!!! I am so happy that her hair is getting so long now. For the longest time, I thought that her hair wouldn’t grow out. And when I wash her hair, it is so long when it’s wet. I know that she will have curly/wavy hair, you can tell especially since her hair just lay flat like mine did when I was her age. My beautiful little girl!
I will continue to work hard to make sure that my little girl continues to grow in every way possible. I want her to know that both her parents are going to be by her side every step of the way and know that she will always have our support.


Next up is dinner… since I kind of slacked off with my afternoon snack, I will have to see what I have for dinner tonight. Maybe a light dinner of whatever is around the house.

And it’s almost time to go home from work… and other than my very first journal entry back in September; this is the 2nd longest entry that I have written. I am looking forward to going home and relaxing tonight, especially since I will be having another long night tomorrow night.

Dinner was good… rice with some roasted chicken, cucumbers and some watercress. It was yummy! I wasn’t able to get outside with Mayalis because she was asleep when I got home and by the time she woke up, it was late and the temperature was starting to drop.

I am already in bed because I am so exhausted after the day that I had at work and hopefully I will be able to get some rest… so that’s why I decided to finish off this entry before I got too tired to type. I have to write up my training journal tomorrow morning, need to make sure that it is done for tomorrow night.

Looking forward to another great day tomorrow.

April 2nd - starting the week off right

The second day of my blogging and the first night of my personal training! OMG! I am so nervous and excited at the same time! I am so looking forward to seeing what this trainer has in store for me. I am going to keep this trainer liable for anything that doesn’t happen! I will make sure that the gym is help liable for no results that come from this trainer… and I will NEVER use another trainer ever again if nothing comes out of this.

I know that the training is more tilted towards me and the effort that I put into it but we are paying for someone to get me results and damn it, I want results! So I am praying for myself – to give me the strength that I need to get the results that I need and want. And to also give me strength to get through any workouts that he might put me through.

My goal is becoming clearer and clearer each passing day… I am so excited for the results come the end of the year. I want to a totally different person. I said at the beginning of this year that this will be my year and by-golly I will make it my year. I am going to accomplish just about all that I have put out there to accomplish!

It is now 9 days until my princess’ birthday and 13 days until her birthday party… I am so excited for both!! She just keeps getting bigger and bigger right before my eyes. I am so amazed of her and everything that she is becoming.

Well, I must share that I got my period over the weekend… month 3 of getting it without any medication. Can someone overuse the word “excited” in one blog posting? LOL!! Okay… so I won’t say I am excited about getting it because how can you but I am thankful that I am getting it naturally again.

I have defeated the doctors who said that I would not be getting my period ever again! And I will defeat them when I get pregnant! I’m telling you, things are finally turning into the right lane for me and I am enjoying every minute of this ride. This is the journey of a lifetime and those that are interested in coming along with me are more than welcome to join in.
Every single day is a new challenge for me, and I face each one of these challenges head on. They test my strength, they test my faith and most importantly, they test me. I want to pass each challenge with flying colors.

I have been reading just about each night now… both for me and to Mayalis. I want her to have the same passion that I have for books. I want to find her one day in her room just lost in a book like I used to do. When everyone else is causing troubles, I was just reading about all sorts of places and people. I want her to have an imagination that will never cease. I want her to have all the opportunities that I had plus more.

So I had my first personal training tonight and it was great. Thankfully I haven’t gained any weight since last week…. So a great way to start off a personal training session. My trainer took it a little slow with me – and he warned me that the next session he wouldn’t be so “nice” – so I was able to make it out of the gym on my own two feet. I felt GREAT!!! I can’t until my next session on Wednesday night at 6:30pm.

I am seeing the light…. The light is VERY far away but I do see a twinkle of light ahead of me.

I am feeling a little more confident… and I can’t wait until I am feeling so confident that I don’t have to think twice about it.

Life is getting so much better for the three of us… and it will only get better.

April 1st... Welcome April

The first of the month, how exciting. I have been waiting for this month since we came into the new year. A very special month for me... Well, not really for me but more the birthday of my beautiful daughter. In just 10 days, she will be 2 years old. I can't believe how time has flown by. She is getting so big... And she's so smart. I guess I'm doing a great job with her so far.

Tomorrow I start my personal training at the gym. I'm so excited!! I am looking forward to finally someone to train me correctly... My last trainer that Joel paid for didn't work me at all. I was so disappointed that I didn't get the results that I wanted. I met the trainer already and he seems like he knows what he is doing. Let's see how it works out.

A couple more things going on this month:
- My nephew, Joshua, 8th birthday on the 9th
- Easter on the 8th
- My father's birthday on the 28th
- My brother and sister-in-law's 10th wedding anniversary

So another goal that I've set for myself is to write my blog every day this month. So that's why I've already started it today. With my other goal of losing 50 pounds by the end of the month, I need to make sure that document this journey that I'm going through.

I look forward to reading these entries later down the road and seeing how hard this was for me... And see that it was all worth it at the end. I can't wait to see my results.